for thee genuinely non excitable

it happens

2010-12-24T21:36:00.000-08:00

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090729090410AAWVvOJ

brel wins again

2010-11-16T13:35:00.000-08:00

If we only have love

Then tomorrow will dawn

And the days of our years

Will rise on that morn

If we only have love

To embrace without fears

We will kiss with our eyes

We will sleep without tears

If we only have love

With our arms open wide

Then the young and the old

Will stand at our side

If we only have love

Love that's falling like rain

Then the parched desert earth

Will grow green again

If we only have love

For the hymn that we shout

For the song that we sing

Then we'll have a way out

If we only have love

We can reach those in pain

We can heal all our wounds

We can use our own names

If we only have love

We can melt all the guns

And then give the new world

To our daughters and sons

If we only have love

Then Jerusalem stands

And then death has no shadow

There are no foreign lands

If we only have love

We will never bow down

We'll be tall as the pines

Neither heroes nor clowns

If we only have love

Then we'll only be men

And we'll drink from the Grail

To be born once again

Then with nothing at all

But the little we are

We'll have conquered all time

All space, the sun, and the stars

banker

2010-11-07T19:02:00.000-08:00

there is no escape from the event
no exit from the mansion
this game room choking with imbeciles

my place of honor at the banquet table is empty

i eat scraps with the servants in the kitchen
i raise my glass to them
and fill their glass's

was i expected to dine with a man who shot gazelles from a jeep
was i to make small talk and carouse
to recite inspirational quotes and cheerful anecdotes
surrounded by the most wondrous strange and elegant of beast's

shot
decapitated
stuffed
and mounted

at my right whole families of giraffe
at my left zebra's
all theses morbid wax idols
eternally grazing

would i say to my courteous kind host with his desert brandy and cigars

what bravery what ingenuity
how were you abel to stalk capture and kill this family of zebra
cunning and elusive as fox's
or this family of giraffe more fierce and deadly than a whole pride of lions
and here these foul gazelles
well by god you have eradicated the scourge of the earth
and single handedly prevented a second advent of the black death

now all you raise your glass's

to the great hunter may he kill everything of tranquil beauty
blessed be he our very own anti noah

but this is fantasy

i will take my place at the mongoloids table
and gorge myself with duck and spirits

and late in the night
with a dead great horned owl after kissing its lacquered beak
i will sleep under the billiard table

rooster rage

2010-11-05T16:49:00.000-07:00

i remember werner hertzog talking about his fear of the chicken because of its "profound stupidity"

i wondered to myself if the rooster crowed in the morning because it was startled by the sun and was so profoundly stupid that it had forgotten this each sunrise now that i live next to one i realize this is not the case it crows all day and all night just because of this profound stupidity

delicados

2010-11-03T14:27:00.000-07:00

simply the best i could live off these if only they made food like this

made an album to be distributed in a phyisical form

2010-11-02T08:46:00.001-07:00

blog blog

2010-10-11T11:38:00.000-07:00

it has been too long
have endured many rooms a half room and two platforms
looking forward to a semi furnished room in Mexico
am contemplating embracing Veganism blog says this aint a word
too much Tao Lin
his writing is very white in a Satie sort of way blog says this aint a word either
wondering if i will ever make an album available in a physical form
am very much in love with someone

have been

2010-07-22T10:29:00.000-07:00

in minnesota since the 6th hung out with an old friend last night in a bum squat by the train tracks drank jim beam and pabst smoked cheap cigars looked through bum trash tooth pain faint after a month long battle i think it gave up for a season heard of a place in philly i might stay for 10 hours per week renivation looking forward to being inducted into the rock hall of failure after a succesfull show at the walker art center yes mom i am legit

beans

2010-06-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

I have been eating a lot of beans.
re-fried beans,pinto beans,and Amy's black beans.
I like to put raw vegetables in them and wrap them in tortillas
with cheese something resembling burritos I guess.
I can't spell and must cut and paste back and fourth from this page to google
apparently i spelled google wrong but if i capitalize it its fine no red dotted line
Google.
this is one useless blog post one useless blog after another.
my teethe hurt.
when I went to the dentist last they cleaned 3/4s of my teeth one section, the southwest one if my mouth was a country ,was left alone to grow and fester I guess.
I have a wisdom tooth coming in and no dental insurance so i just eat pain pills and sweat because my liver cant take it.
I made an album over a year ago in Ireland that never got mixed this is not the first time this has happened.
I am going away soon to a future unimaginable.
Minnesota then I don't know Glasgow?
I felt that in some tiny way if I posted this it would make me feel better it does not

2010-05-28T15:22:00.000-07:00

2010-05-14T15:05:00.001-07:00

let us begin

2010-05-10T16:04:00.000-07:00

with small bird chirps
though even these tiny creatures be derived
from the giant lumbering ghosts of reptiles

let us begin
with melodic a-rhythmic utterances
as our throat muscles strengthen
through affectionate exercise
after days eons of repetition
let us acquire control of the minute
and the vast expanse of song

i am a wale
now i am a butterfly
i am all that i can conceive of or give name to
my body will fail me

or Vice-Versa

but i am free for now
and perfect
like a cloud like a myth
i am the mountain and the man
that fire that purifies your hands
that first and last thought as you rise and fall
as you give birth
as you rest in the ground

shall i hold the stars in place
stop the sky
as one shuts up a book

and what are these lines here
drawn on the continents
these precious metals
that jingle in pockets
horded in caves
and these silly flags
oh man
you truly are a wonder
oh man alive
in your sandbox with your wooden gun
if you were born with a tail
wings
maybe a singular horn
what would you do then
be more agile in the trees
fly
communicate with me through your antennae
oh my swans my clay doves
my flowers
have some hope

a king

2010-05-10T16:03:00.000-07:00

aching

some recent writings have offended you

2010-05-10T16:02:00.000-07:00

that will happen

Eeee Eee Eeee

2010-04-26T10:29:00.001-07:00

if i were to start a religion based on a text

2010-04-25T22:52:00.003-07:00

the text would have to be that of "my life" by Lyn Hejinian
i have been reading it all weekend and like Plath's Ariel
it is so deep and sharp that one longs to build a chapel and to read it aloud
from behind an altar without useless dogmatic symbolism
forever with out food or drink till that long sleep death
truly stunning i regret taking so long to obtain it
and I'm sure it will be in my breast pocket for many years to come
tattered and worn and loved like the synthetic fur rubbed off your favorite stuffed animal from a distant childhood

little boy torn

2010-04-24T19:29:00.001-07:00

When my love moved to the moon

2010-04-18T17:37:00.000-07:00

I became a fish wounded by buckshot
rotting on a bench
with that specter loneliness
tortured by a yellow hum
not anyone dare touch me
after I gulp down the last laps of rancid water
and vomit up my hearts
all of them
i will beg the sun to stop all this brash light

dinosaur dreams

2010-04-17T09:42:00.000-07:00

rockmuffin

2010-04-16T14:41:00.000-07:00

today i saw a rocker totally decked out the hair the make up the ripped torn black t the tight bulge pants the leather knee high boots the bullet belt the chain wallet he was walking down the street in the sunny morning carrying a plate of steaming bran muffins it was so absurd i laughed so hard i almost vomited

2010-04-15T09:34:00.000-07:00

its strange to wake in the morning and notice that what one always thought to be a weed actually sleeps and blooms like any actual flower I remember as a child rubbing the yellow into my wrist or blowing the spores into the wind let all of our lawns go back to prairie

I accept you

2010-04-14T23:07:00.000-07:00

though you may be quite insane

not in the popular sense
all straight jacket and padded cell

talking to yourself

checking the locks over and over unable to leave
and
washing your hands until they are raw

no

its much more complex than that more self stimulating
like the thousands of parentless babies kept in an airplane hanger after the bomb fell on Hiroshima there were not enough nurses to cuddle them so they began rocking themselves
back and forth back and forth with thumbs all swollen
what a sight it must have been

you need to be touched and caressed
to be kissed and loved
my little bird
my prize

but you don't know that do you
crying
then rocking yourself to sleep

go away

2010-04-14T01:34:00.000-07:00

the room is silent excepting the hum of the fridge and the shuffling of various appendages the party commences a book is rifled through
someone begins to read aloud the fridge stops its bland drone and the room becomes warmer though the heater ceased its breath hours before

another reader and another
some discourse about the text
then again another reader

wait a minute i have something important to say
(the fridge begins its awful atonal song)
no really i want you guys to hear this what i have to say is really important
(a chill fills the room someone gets up to turn the heater on the spirit has left)

for the next twenty minuets the idiot speaks in circles saying absolutely nothing like a dog chasing its own tail arguing with himself in a crowded room pontificating with fifty cent words
many laugh nervously some actually try to make sense out of nonsense a few stare at their feet or the floor waiting for it to end to return to silence to a calm reverence
the book is shut why bother opening it in this commotion this petty doubt

at some point we must pray after the tired jokes and boring puns have finally run out
real babies are dying of double kidney failure real mothers have broken feet the woman sitting across from you may have any number of cancers

shut up fool babble someplace else if you have no respect for our king nor your peers at the very least quit contradicting your own sweet self
just pray casual whatever

around and around we go all others in earnest
one begins and the silence and the warmth return
words seep slowly like sap then flow like tears

amen

no please sir
no really you imbecile
please just

go away

new shoes

2010-04-13T16:40:00.001-07:00

who dont hate nike ? but they were only 9 greenbacks and you know tramps like us, baby we were born to run

I am sick

2010-04-13T10:44:00.000-07:00

and making Felix Unger noises to itch my throat is not helping in any way
why is my stomach filled with dirt?
why are the crows so loud in these neighborhoods?
why am I always in love?
I am going to smoke so many cigarettes today that my sickness gets sick and flees
my ears are dirty
I need steam and lots of it
I am taking a stand against the dairy industry
very vehemently marching through the streets
maybe I will pay some homeless to march with me
down with tillamook down with dairygold
I am being absurd
I am sorry
no I'm not
I enjoy it
change all the billboards

"GOT LACTOSE INTOLERANCE?"

vos vos

2010-04-13T00:29:00.000-07:00

virgin spinsters

2010-04-12T21:30:00.000-07:00

will always be alone
untouchable
like clouds or moth wings

their priorities are all out of tune
looking for some lofty perfection
it dose not exist at all

I'm saying baby don't be so silly
your naivety is no longer interesting
it hurts my ribs

ideal is a daydream
you have been daydreaming for 30 years
about some life size poseable wire rubber doll that nods yes to everything
has clear teeth and tight mountaineering biceps
sweats green tea and builds impossible steel bridges across the oceans
continent to continent

at the montessori school I planted a tree
it stood strong and tall like me its branch veins reaching out toward the planets
I make beautiful all day long
so you call me when you are alone at night
and its strange because

its strange because I am yours